I never claimed to be normal

This year there were a mix of ups and downs, but for the most part, I will say it was one of my better years, especially in the later half.

There were some things this year that were upsetting to me. Some people who revealed they did not have my best interests in mind who are no longer in my life. I spent some time questioning why they did what they did, or questioning honestly if I was in the wrong at any point where I may have caused them to treat me poorly. When I read that sentence back it sounds ridiculous. It’s a habit of self blame I have. I feel that if I put all the blame on me, I have control and can prevent mistreatment by acting a certain way. This is a thought process I’m working on getting rid of. Part of that is putting responsibility where it belongs – on the other person or people who mistreated me.

This is my post to say that I forgive the people who treated me poorly this year. This isn’t to say it’s okay what they did, it’s to finally get the closure I deserve because it’s unrealistic to expect it from them. I’ve had people who mistreated me have guilt pop up and try to apologize months or years later, or “follow” me online and if any of them are reading this I want to say please do not let the guilt eat at you. I am living well now, and that is enough for me. I hope you can do the same.

I also wanted to take the time to give gratitude to the people in my life who I met this year who have treated me well. It really means a lot to me to feel seen, heard, and respected for who I am. It also inspires me to be surrounded by kind, generous, and funny people. It makes me feel comfortable being who I am and I won’t ever take that for granted, especially coming from a history of people misunderstanding me often and not accepting me. There’s a chance these people are reading this too, and I wanted to just say thank you for everything.

This year was transformative for me. I learned a lot about myself, what I will tolerate and what I won’t. I’ve gained more self esteem and feel like I got my creative drive back. If 2026 is half as transformative as this year I will be happy!