I never claimed to be normal

This past week I have been waking up at 3 AM and starting my day. Waking up at this time was not planned, it was just what my body felt like doing. I was working on a project which I was very passionate about, and wanted it to be done by a certain deadline. So I worked on it daily for 6-8 hours to try to get it finished by Friday (yesterday). Since I had other things to do during the day, the early morning hours is when I would work on it. There was something peaceful about the quiet morning hours, but I could feel myself getting very overstimulated from the amount I was doing daily and the lack of adequate sleep. I had more caffeine than usual to keep up my energy, but I don’t think that was the best thing for my body.

I have been booking massages lately to help with relaxation, stress reduction, and my aversion to touch. My massage happened to be booked at the perfect time for me (the day of my deadline), and I am so glad for that. One thing my massage therapist says she noticed is how my right hand and arm is the tightest it has been. I am right handed, so I use my right hand more when I am doing/making things. So it makes sense that it might be a little sore right now, but this is an escalation from my previous massage where she said “there’s something going on in your right hand”. I don’t want to know what would be the next escalation if I don’t slow down but I have an idea.

My mother developed something called trigger finger from using a pricing gun regularly at a volunteer job. I imagine it’s very uncomfortable for her especially on top of having arthritis. Seeing that happen, I want to do what I can to avoid it. I love making things and I actually thrive on repetitive tasks using my right hand, but I need to take more breaks. My deadline was actually self created. I didn’t need to rush things. I needed to slow down. Part of me liked the challenge, but there are other ways I can challenge myself without causing discomfort and possible harm to my body.

I finished my project. I have another deadline and project coming up for easter, but I’m going to be smarter about it. I’m not going to work for hours daily without much of a break. I’m going to monitor my hand and how it’s feeling and not push past discomfort. I’m also going to practice doing some tasks with my left hand which is good for your brain as well.

As for this next week, I’m taking it easy. I’m going to travel for an overnight trip to see my mom and her cat. Petting him is the only repetitive hand task I will be doing for a little while.